Body Selling

Posted by shush

January 7, 2015

The parts of the body can be sold for various amounts depending on the need of the person waiting for a transplant. From the hair, to the limbs, to the internal organs and even the blood. To some it is a way of living. To others it’s a kindness to those in need.

But there is a kind of body selling that is called another word.
Prostitution.

It is said that prostitution is when you pay someone to engage in any form of sexual intercourse. So naturally, as a stereotype, it’s someone whom you pick-up somewhere, use, pay and leave. It may be the same gender as the one paying or not. By use, there are different levels. By someone, there are different ages. By pay there are different rates. And by leave there are two ways, the one where you never return and the other where you take in the prostitute as a regular source of pleasure (and possibly even some pain).

It is one of the oldest professions that is non-taxable and illegal in many countries. But it is one of the oldest professions that has put food on many tables, children and adults through years of education, and clothing and shelter for many families.

The trade-offs are, but not limited to, the person doing the body selling can either get or transmit a disease, become an unfeeling thing devoid of emotional attachments, become a publicly humiliated person insulted on a regular basis, become a disillusioned person for the rest of their life, or conceive children that may or may not have the same profession as adults.

And yet, the bottomline is simply the need for money to pay for the basic necessities, until eventually it becomes a way to pay for even the luxuries in life.

These are those we call prostitutes.

But what we do not include in the stereotype is this group of implicit prostitutes.

Those who engage themselves in prolonged relationships with married people are also prostitutes in some form. Prolonged means doing the mistake more than twice, for even children know that more than twice deserves a punishment. Why? What if they do not accept any payment whatsoever after any form of sexual intercourse? With that I doubt. Give me an example of a man or a woman who has had sexual intercourse with a married person and has not received anything in return. Here are examples of different forms of payment.

- Time and attention that the married person should have given to the legal family and was spent with them
- Little gifts bought during special occasions or on a whim
- Food or drinks to have before, during or afterwards any form of interaction

Seems like something anyone would also give a friend? Maybe, but here’s the difference. Friends don’t get it because they had sexual intercourse with their friends. They get it because they didn’t get sexual intercourse with their friends and kept the relationship platonic.

There is a difference in knowing that one of the married couples has an addiction to prostitutes and to implicit prostitutes. Paid prostitutes do it because they need the money, and they expect that they get paid after giving their sexual services. And if someone comes along who would want them exclusively and pays them more, they treat it as a business deal and accept the better offer. Practical decisions.

With implicit prostitutes, there are dire consequences. One of which is the destruction of the union of two people who under the laws of their country and whichever god they believe in has been written as legal and binding. Then there is the psychological effect on the families of the concerned spouses who either develop negative values on the essence of marriage or believe that having implicit prostitutes are an acceptable thing to do.

A friend of mine and I, when I was so much younger, wrote down the various ways someone could get an implicit prostitute into their lives. We wrote them down because we wanted to make sure that if it happened to us, we would know the possible sources. Here are some usual and unusual ones.

- A total stranger
- An old friend
- A friend of an old friend
- A friend or relative of someone who owes you something that they cannot repay
- A friend or relative of someone who is afraid of the person divulging their dirty secret
- An officemate who’s single
- An officemate who is also married, so that when one of them get’s pregnant, they could always say it was their spouse’s child and not from the illicit sexual relationship they have/had
- A customer or client
- A neighbor
- A relative of the spouse
- A person from any of the communities or groups that the person belongs to

A few years ago, an old friend of mine told me that her husband was cheating on her. I asked if it was a paid one or one with emotional attachments. When she told me that it was the kind that had emotional attachments, I told her the same thing I told myself when my friend and I wrote down the things above.

“Men are naturally polygamous. It is their nature, whether they accept it or not. You have to accept that your husband is weak and needs something besides you to make his ego feel bigger and better. Very few men are able to say no to temptation. It’s sad that you got one who isn’t a man enough to look away and walk out the door.”

So while she continued to cry, I continued to say these.

“With all your money and your parents’ influence, you could have the woman killed or thrown away to some far away place. I don’t think you’re the type of person who would do that. So how about this, why not just ask everyday for someone single and better to come along into her life and whisk her away from your husband. Ask for someone who would be so good to her that she would regret for the rest of her life having slept with your husband.”

Then she told me I was being sarcastic. And I told her I wasn’t. Then I explained to her slowly the logic of it.

Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. If she asked her parents to get rid of the “problem” who’s to say that her husband won’t repeat it again, or that she herself would be given the same kind of temptation and wouldn’t be able to resist it, or worse, that her own children, when they started getting some, would also have the same “hobby” as their father.

If she asked for something good for the “problem” then the problem would solve itself. For humans, no matter how demented their minds and hearts are, when given kindness eventually chooses the kindness over the painful option. And then when they have reached that point of realization, no matter how many years it would take, then revenge would have been completed.

There is no better revenge than to have those who have caused the pain in your life realize that they have made a mistake, and would live the rest of their lives knowing that they made a mistake. Then the torture comes next. The torture that they would live the rest of their lives unable to apologize for that mistake because to apologize would mean they would be confessing to a crime that is punishable by law. This is what is called getting revenge without asking for it. For nature is naturally orderly. If you seek revenge, order is disrupted. If you seek for the right solution, then the orderly process of nature takes place.

In my country, it is a fact that adultery is tolerated rather than being fought out in court. Why? Because we do not have divorce. So our only option is annulment. And when that happens, if you have children, all the legitimate children would turn into illegitimate children, and all the supposed inheritance of the children shall be for naught. And if the adulterous person decides to marry the one with whom he/she has had an illicit affair with, their illegitimate children, if any, would become legitimate.

Unfair right?

But if you are the type of parent who would not let your legitimate children turn into illegitimate children just because your spouse does not have control or has difficulty saying no to illicit sexual advances, then you would do what you would have to do.

The word implicit prostitute is offending to many, I am aware of that. But it’s a truth that has to be accepted.

It’s been many years since that conversation with my friend. They have survived that illicit affair and their marriage has become stronger. The woman had married someone from outside the country.

And now, I find myself in the same situation, with a husband that has an implicit prostitute. So I ask for the same thing everyday. That she finds someone single who is better than my husband who would eventually whisk her away and let her feel loved and cared for with children that would fill their lives with joy. So much so that she would understand why, no matter how much it hurts to know everyday that when my husband leaves work and goes to her place to “unwind”, I still try to keep my family together.

And I believe that everyday. I believe that someday someone would take care of the “problem” so that the “problem” would take care of itself. For sometimes the problem exists because we think there is nothing better for us than what we have now, not believing that there is something better to come.

Keeping Safe, Momhood, Streetwise

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